A poem i wrote when i was like sixteen.
The Past Still Haunts Me
My heart has been stabbed at and thrown away
Ripped to pieces in every which way
Why do I always put up a fight
And then turn around and feel contrite
My life was great but I smoked it away
Someone else's life is what I portray
I really needed to stop but I didn’t know how
I would ignore everything I did and just disavow
The pain was just too much to bear
And all along you were totally unaware
Of all the destructive things I did
If you knew you would have forbid
My life and how I was living it then
You would have condoned me once again
And not believed a word I said
But just accused me of lying instead
So here we are face to face
I wish you would capture me in your embrace
To get me out of this hell I live
Open your heart and please forgive
Everything I did that was so terrible
But realize for me that my life was unbearable
Maybe that’s why I cut
I just wanted my Hells doors to shut
This is the only way I thought they would close
I guess that’s just the way life goes
Sorry, but now my scars are gone
From the world I had withdrawn
Myself and what I really wanted
Because I knew my life was daunted
So I guess it was the weed that broke my heart
All I wanted to do is depart
Or at least see all my blood go away
And my brain was always in such disarray
So basically drugs and cutting was my life
But oh, if you knew, my life would have been strife.
